rambeltilx:

birdghost:

videohall:

A parakeet trying his hardest to say ‘Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition’

I’M CRYING

the spanish inqui-baby bird

rftminges:

this is the weirdest job app i’ve ever filled out

rftminges:

this is the weirdest job app i’ve ever filled out

(Source: rftminges)

thepacificrimjob:

sorry guys i tripped

thepacificrimjob:

sorry guys i tripped

(Source: theclearlydope)

the-chinglish:

WHAT A BRILLIANT STORY

the-chinglish:

WHAT A BRILLIANT STORY

(Source: memewhore)

Anonymous said: What advice do you have for a 14 year old girl?

porn4smartgirls:

This is so vague I love it. The voices you are hearing are real, god is speaking to you. The nation of France needs you. Don your armor, take up arms, lead the French army. This is your destiny, joan. When the flames come for you let them lick your bones and laugh.

teacher:are there any classes you are struggling with?
me:the bourgeois
teacher:what
me:what
karl marx:nice

goddammitstacey:

I just watched a hardened criminal slide knees first through a gallon of spilled lube while having a shoot out with a bunch of highly trained hit men

image

this show is beyond a gift

this show is fucking christmas

me:what are taxes and how do I pay them?
school system:worry not
school system:mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell

humentallyinsane:

mlpstrider:

napoleon-is-complex:

mlpstrider:

But how did Edward get it up if vampires don’t have blood

because i wasted money on this big informational book about the series i can tell you. Stephanie Meyers said that all the vampires had venom to replace all bodily fluids. He came venom. His penis was a literal snake. Yes

oH MY GOd thIS IS BETTER THAN ANYTHING I COULD HAVE HOPED FOr

His… Anaconda do.

(Source: iampietromaximoff)